Real-life vacation drama

© Sarah Lipoff 2011

So, since heading out for our adventurous vacation at 4:30am Saturday morning, we’ve had a couple of things happen that are just too funny not to share. And, you’ve had stuff like this happen to you while on vacation, too, right? Right??!

1. While making amazing time on the drive to our beach-y destination, I passed the babe a new and interesting collection of books, some nice warm milk, and cereal for a tasty road trip  breakfast. Just after the hubs and I had commented how well she was behaving we heard an interesting noise coming from the back seat. I turned around to see the wee tot tossing up that nice milk and cereal all over her just washed – and essential-to-happiness blanket. As the husband quickly pulled over I grabbed at anything to wipe up the mess, and deftly removed the blanket from babe’s clutches. We spent the rest of the five hours we had to drive with the windows open and trying not to breath through our noses.

2. Because I am cheap and didn’t want to spend the first hours of our beach vacation at the laundry-mat, I washed out the smelly uber-important blanket in the bathtub and then hung it out to dry, assuming I had fixed the situation and the rest of our vacation would go smoothly. When I returned to the bathroom to use the potty, I discovered the bathroom door had miraculously locked itself. I spend several minutes building up a sweat while using a nail file to unlock the locked door. Just when I was about to break the door down from having to pee so bad and utter frustration, the door magically opened like nothing ever happened.

3. The husband somehow got sick and lost his voice no less than three hours after arrival. We decided it was imperative to head to the drugstore to get some sort of medication. While dragging the child to the car to hit the store, she screamed like a banshee, “NOOOOOO CAAAAAAR! NO. CAR!” The husband resorted to taking a long hot shower and drinking some orange juice.

4. While at the beach the child refused to go anywhere near the water and proceeded to grab and run with any beach toys she could get her hands on – especially if they weren’t hers.

5. Yesterday, while slathering sunblock on the wee tot, the husband and I forgot to slather-up ourselves. The babe is good-to-go in the sun today, the hubs and I, on the other hand, both look like lobsters.

*Here’s a special bonus. While walking yesterday, we observed a family out riding bikes. The dad let the daughter take a pretty big hill all on her own. As a group of us watched with total anticipation (and fear) the daughter started losing control of her bike and several gasped – but I exclaimed, “ohhhhhh, SHIT!” as she went slamming into the curb before regaining enough control so she didn’t go crashing into some serious rocks. And, then, our lovely daughter yelled out, “AW SHIT” and everyone looked at us instead.

And those are just the highlights from our first two days!

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